Wednesday, December 1, 2010

We Interrupt Your Regular Programming for Sobfest

Ember will be a whole year old tomorrow.
We are rounding home on her first trip around the sun.
Time is running down on this 364th day.
I've been teetering on the brink of an ugly cry all day.
At one point, I actually sat on the floor and took in the world from her perspective. I want to appreciate it all.
We've been banking lots of snuggles the last two nights since she is teething. There are four coming in all at once and they are taking their sweet time.

I sat in her rocker last night, rocking and soothing her to sleep.
I opened up all my senses as wide as possible to soak up the moment and savour the right now of it all.
My eyes to remember every curly locket of hair, the way her feet still flex like a newborns, and the pudge of her thigh.
My nose to inhale her sweet breath and the scent of her freshly bathed body.
My ears so I could fully appreciate the perfect rhythm of her inhalations and exhalations.
My mouth so I could kiss her oh so kissable face perched just-so on my shoulder, being sure to plant a few on her rosy, apple cheeks.
And my hands: I wrapped one around her torso, managing to cover the expanse of her back, and the other supported her tush so we could rock, back and forth, back and forth, slowly helping to lull my girl to sleep to dream sweet dreams.

I recalled how nearly 365 days ago, how very differently our bodies fit together. How her tiny, fresh to the world body, fit between my collar bone and belly button.
I thought about how for our first nights together, she slept on my bare chest and we formed an unmistakable, heartfelt bond.
My heart swells.


  1. Well now you've got me all teary.
    She'll amaze you tomorrow too!
    I'll be thinking of you! Happy Birthday Ember!
    And a very very very special wish for a very special day for you and Ember's daddy (his name is escaping me, sorry) tomorrow!

  2. Happy Birthday Ember!!! Such wonderful words!!! Truely!!! A great way to put life into perspective eh!!! Nothing really all that more important then the precious moments we have with our children!!! Although they grow up in the blink of an eye, they will always be our babies and forever will you keep her in your heart just the way you are seeing her right at this very moment!!!!!! Enjoy her 1st Birthday!!!

  3. Andrew and I thank you Kristin! ;o) She's already amazed me today - you weren't kidding.

  4. Thank you Deanna! This year has gone by SO fast. Stopping to smell the roses as they say, it the only way to stay afloat sometimes, huh? :o)

  5. I am amazed that she is one already! Happy belated birthday to you Ember! Such a touching post Sarah....I got all "misty-eyed" as my dad likes to say :)

    p.s. did Ruby bear arrive in time for the birthday celebration? i hope she likes it!

  6. Thank you.
    Ruby bear did arrive on her birthday! Although, I've decided to tuck her away and make her a Christmas surprise. Ruby bear is just beautiful. I love how big and squeezable she is! Ember will adore her to be sure. Thank you. :o)